5 Ways Psychology Improves Communication Skills
Psychologist Brief
5 Ways Psychology Improves Communication Skills
Effective communication is a cornerstone of success in both personal and professional realms. This article delves into psychological techniques that can significantly enhance communication skills. Drawing insights from experts in the field, it explores practical strategies to improve workplace relationships, build trust, and foster stronger connections.
- Prioritize Regulation in Tense Professional Collaborations
- Employ Gottman-Rapaport Method for Stronger Connections
- Use Reflective Listening to Build Trust
- Practice Active Listening to Improve Workplace Relationships
- Apply Improv Techniques to Enhance Communication Skills
Prioritize Regulation in Tense Professional Collaborations
As a psychotherapist and mentor, my understanding of psychology informs almost every facet of how I communicate, but one moment that stands out was during a professional collaboration that had become tense.
A colleague and I were working on a shared project, and I noticed a pattern: every time we disagreed, she would become withdrawn, and I would feel the urge to over-explain or convince. Early in my career, I might have leaned into that tendency, to try to fix, clarify, or win someone over. But my training taught me that when someone shuts down, it's often about safety, not resistance.
So I did something different: I paused the conversation and acknowledged the shift in tone without blame. I said something like, "I sense that something in our conversation is feeling off. I care about how we both feel in this process... can we take a moment to reset together?" Instead of pushing for resolution, I prioritized regulation, attunement, and shared intention. The energy softened almost immediately.
The outcome? Not only did we move through the conflict with more ease, but it deepened our trust and allowed for a more honest and productive working relationship moving forward.
In both personal and professional settings, the most powerful communication often comes from understanding what's underneath the words. Psychology helps us listen not just to what's said, but to what's needed. And that's where connection truly lives.
Employ Gottman-Rapaport Method for Stronger Connections
I have utilized aspects of the Gottman-Rapaport method numerous times in my personal relationships. This technique is commonly employed in couples counseling and was developed by the Gottmans. It involves using "I" statements, repeating what you heard from the other person, and validating their perspective. It's remarkable how much the other person's emotions changed when I remained calm, helped them feel heard, and validated their perspective. This approach can be used with anyone, not just your partner, and helps build a stronger connection. The best part is that you don't have to agree to validate the other person's perspective, allowing me to stay grounded in my own view while remaining open to listening to the other person.
Use Reflective Listening to Build Trust
As a psychologist and the founder of a mental health platform, I've found that one of the most powerful tools in communication is active listening -- not just hearing words, but deeply understanding what's behind them.
One situation that stands out was during a session with a client who was resistant and emotionally closed off. Instead of trying to "pull" answers or offer solutions too quickly (which often creates more resistance), I applied the principle of reflective listening -- paraphrasing their thoughts in a way that showed understanding without judgment.
For example, instead of saying, "You need to open up more," I reflected with, "It sounds like you've had to protect yourself for a long time -- that must be exhausting." That one sentence shifted the entire tone of the conversation. The client paused, took a deep breath, and then started speaking more openly. From that point forward, the therapeutic alliance strengthened significantly.
This experience reinforced how psychological insight -- particularly in understanding defense mechanisms, trauma responses, and emotional triggers -- helps build trust, which is essential for any effective communication, whether in therapy, leadership, or personal relationships.
Practice Active Listening to Improve Workplace Relationships
I've used my understanding of psychology many times to improve how I communicate, especially in tough conversations--like those where emotions could easily spiral. One moment that really stands out was during a project at work where a teammate kept missing deadlines, and I was honestly getting very frustrated.
Instead of reacting out of irritation, I paused and reminded myself about emotional intelligence--something I truly value. I thought about how their behavior might stem from being overwhelmed, not laziness. So, I used active listening and asked open-ended questions like, "Hey, how's everything going on your end?" instead of, "Why are you late again?"
That simple shift created a totally different energy. They opened up about personal stress, and we actually found ways to rework the timeline together. After that, our collaboration flowed much better. I think when I stopped assuming and started seeking to understand, everything changed.
Apply Improv Techniques to Enhance Communication Skills
One of the most unexpected ways I've used active listening is in improv. (Yes, therapy brain even follows me there.) In improv, the golden rule is "Yes, and"—you take what your scene partner gives you and build on it. But to do that well, you have to really listen—not just to their words, but to their tone, body language, and what they might be setting up in the scene. If you're too busy thinking about what you want to say next, you miss the moment.
This mirrors what I do as a therapist—listening beyond just words, attuning to the underlying emotions, and responding in a way that moves the conversation forward instead of shutting it down. In improv, this meant I was able to pick up on subtle cues and run with them, which made the scenes way funnier and more connected. In real life? It's made me better at reading people, rolling with the unexpected, and staying present instead of getting stuck in my own head. Turns out, whether you're in a comedy scene or a tough conversation, really hearing someone makes all the difference.
