10 Ways Psychology Explains Surprising Human Behaviors
Human behavior often defies logic, but psychology offers clear explanations for why people act in unexpected ways. This article breaks down ten research-backed principles that reveal the hidden patterns behind everyday decisions and actions. Insights from leading behavioral scientists show how these psychological mechanisms shape everything from workplace interactions to personal relationships.
Honor Effort Before You Suggest Changes
A moment that really stayed with me happened during a team meeting a few years ago. A colleague, who was usually calm and thoughtful, became unusually defensive when someone questioned a decision she had made. At the time, I remember feeling confused and even a little frustrated because her reaction felt disproportionate to the situation. It wasn't until later, when I reflected on the interaction, that I recognized what was happening: she was experiencing commitment bias—the tendency to defend a choice simply because we've already invested time, effort, or identity into it.
She had spent weeks working on that project, and the suggestion to revise her approach felt less like feedback and more like a threat to her competence. Once I understood that, her reaction made complete sense. The defensiveness wasn't about the content of the critique; it was about protecting her sense of self and the work she had already poured into the decision.
What I learned from that experience was to look beneath the surface of people's reactions. Psychological biases often shape behavior in ways we don't immediately see—especially when someone feels vulnerable, judged, or uncertain. Instead of assuming someone is being "difficult," it's often more accurate to assume they're protecting something important to them, even unconsciously.
Since then, I've adjusted the way I give feedback. I try to acknowledge the effort someone has put into their work before offering suggestions, and I frame changes as collaborative improvements rather than challenges to their judgment. This approach has led to smoother conversations and fewer defensive responses.
The experience reminded me that understanding human behavior requires curiosity, not quick conclusions. Biases don't make people irrational—they make them human.
Lead With Authentic Evidence
Once I shifted my focus from trying to convince people to sharing real examples of what we've done, I was blown away at how quickly everyone started changing their opinion! Later, I realised that the main driver for the change in opinion was social proof.
By presenting actual workflows and success stories from customers, I was able to illustrate the advantages of my ideas and help people make faster decisions and develop trust in me.
The biggest lesson I learned was to use authentic evidence as my starting point instead of arguments. Going forward, I will be structuring my discussions around the success of others who have used this method in their businesses.
Offer Choices To Preserve Autonomy
The "Helpful" Advice That Backfired
Early in my career, I was working with a teenager struggling with severe anxiety. One session, he practically begged for a solution to his panic attacks. I immediately offered a clinically proven, two-minute breathing technique. I expected him to be relieved. Instead, he snapped, "Stop trying to fix me!" and refused to speak for the rest of the hour.
I was baffled. He had asked for a tool, and when I gave it to him, he attacked the solution.
Later, I realized I had triggered Psychological Reactance. This is a phenomenon where a person perceives a specific instruction—even a helpful one—as a threat to their behavioral freedom. The brain's automatic response is to rebel to regain a sense of autonomy. By saying, "You should do this," I had inadvertently taken the "driver's seat" in his life, which only increased his anxiety.
What I Learned: I learned that in psychiatry, agency is the antidote to anxiety. Now, I never just "prescribe" a coping skill. Instead, I offer a menu. I say, "Here are three strategies that have worked for others. You can try one, all, or none of them. It is up to you." The moment the patient feels the choice is theirs, the resistance usually vanishes, and the healing begins.
Educate With Transparent Outcomes
I once faced this at Estorytellers while reviewing feedback from a potential client. They strongly favored a well-known agency, even though our proposal was clearer, more detailed, and better priced. At first, I felt confused and a bit disappointed. Later, I realized this behavior was driven by authority bias. The client assumed that a bigger name automatically meant better quality.
This experience taught me an important lesson. People often don't decide based on logic alone. Perception plays a huge role. Instead of pushing harder, we adjusted our approach. We started sharing proof early, such as real case studies, client results, and behind-the-scenes processes from our ghostwriting, publishing, and marketing work.
What I learned is simple. Never assume people see value the same way you do. Address hidden biases with clarity and evidence. When you educate calmly and show real outcomes, trust builds naturally. That awareness has helped me communicate better and sell smarter ever since.
Make Critical Facts Most Memorable
I was surprised by a client who insisted on an unnecessary, expensive upgrade to their eaves, completely ignoring the structural integrity report we provided. The conflict is the trade-off: abstract appearance was prioritized, which created a massive structural failure in their financial planning; they were focused on the one visible component.
I later realized the behavior was driven by Availability Heuristic. They had recently seen a competitor's glossy ad specifically showing detailed, decorative eaves, and the image stuck. Even though the roof deck and flashing were the critical heavy duty elements needing replacement, the highly available, recent memory of the eave advertisement outweighed the verifiable data we presented.
What I learned is that logical facts often lose to highly available, emotional memories. I learned that just presenting the verifiable structural facts is not enough. My approach changed: I trade passive fact delivery for disciplined, hands-on control of the presentation. Now, I start every pitch by visually isolating and detailing the most critical structural weaknesses first, making our verifiable data the most "available" memory, thereby preventing that cognitive bias from creating financial chaos. The best way to deal with bias is to be a person who is committed to a simple, hands-on solution that prioritizes anchoring the verifiable structural reality early in the conversation.
Prize Purpose Over Credentials
I was completely blindsided a few years ago when I decided to launch our first small line of athletic wear at Co-Wear LLC. I brought in a freelance designer who had a fantastic resume and glowing recommendations. I was confident he was the right person because he graduated from a top design school and had worked for a major sports brand for three years.
I was surprised when he insisted on using very specific, complicated technical fabrics that were expensive, hard to source, and frankly, unnecessary for our simple beginner line. Every time I questioned him, he got very defensive and just repeated that this was the industry standard and the only professional way to do it.
I realized later that he was suffering from Dunning-Kruger effect. He wasn't malicious; he was just overly confident in his limited knowledge of our market segment. Because he came from a hyper-technical, high-performance background, he couldn't see that our customers—who prioritize comfort and inclusion over elite performance—needed something simple and durable. He was operating at the peak of Mount Stupid, so convinced his method was the only way that he became blind to simpler, better solutions.
What I learned is to always question credentials over purpose. Now, when hiring or contracting, I make people explain the why behind their decisions with zero jargon. I don't care about their old company's standards; I care about how they solve our customers' problems. It was a harsh lesson in humility, not just for him, but for me, for trusting a piece of paper over critical thinking.
Highlight Safety And Clear Upside
Early in our startup, I was frustrated when a potential partner seemed overly cautious and kept pushing back on ideas we thought were low-risk. At first, I took it personally, thinking they didn't trust us. Later, I realized their behavior was influenced by a common psychological bias—loss aversion—they were more focused on avoiding potential negatives than seeing the potential upside. Understanding this completely changed how I approached the conversation: I reframed proposals to highlight risk mitigation and clear benefits, which built trust and moved the deal forward. I learned that what looks like resistance or negativity often isn't personal; it's a predictable human response, and recognizing it can turn conflict into collaboration.
Emphasize Mastery And Personal Control
I was once frustrated by a teammate resisting a new tool. Later I realized loss aversion was driving their reaction. They feared losing mastery, not the change itself. I reframed the rollout around skill growth and control. Their attitude shifted fast. That moment taught me to look past behavior and ask what fear might be underneath.
Sell Certainty With Guarantees And Testimonials
Early on at Honeycomb Air, I was genuinely surprised and frustrated by a customer who insisted on getting the opinion of three different companies for a simple AC repair, even though our quote was the most honest and transparent. I thought our technical expertise should have won the job immediately. I was confused why she kept seeking more advice, even after we showed her the broken part. It seemed like a huge waste of her time, and mine, since we are usually the cheapest option in San Antonio.
I realized later that her behavior was a classic example of choice overload and seeking "social proof." She wasn't questioning our diagnosis; she was overwhelmed by the importance of the decision—it's expensive and crucial for her family's comfort. She was collecting confirmation bias, hoping the third or fourth technician would simply make the choice feel safer. My initial reaction was to push harder on the facts, but that just added pressure.
The big lesson I learned from that experience is that in the service industry, you are selling certainty, not just service. Our technical facts matter, but the customer's emotional need for reassurance matters more. Now, when we present a quote, we don't just state the price; we emphasize our guarantees and share customer testimonials immediately. We learned to preemptively satisfy that need for social proof, making the decision easier for them, and that's what ultimately wins the customer's trust.
Anchor New Ideas To Familiar Wins
I once watched a colleague dismiss a clearly superior solution in a strategy meeting, and at the time I read it as stubbornness—later I realized it was a textbook case of status quo bias, where sticking with the familiar felt safer than acknowledging a better option. The moment I reframed it that way, their behavior made complete sense, and it changed how I approached similar conversations. Instead of pushing harder on logic, I started anchoring new ideas to existing successes so the shift felt evolutionary rather than threatening. It taught me that most resistance isn't incompetence or ego—it's psychology, and when you speak to the bias instead of the behavior, people move much faster.
Albert Richer, Founder, WhatAreTheBest.com
